Sicily 2024 – Catania’s Markets

Friday 24 May

The weather has been consistently wonderful in Sicily, apart from the thunderstorm on the first day. So it has been very conducive to sitting in cafes, one of the many pleasures in going to Italy. Our first cafe was in Via Vitoria Emanuel, a very busy street where our flat is situated. It is in a big baroque mansion block, which has huge gates on the street and multiple gates to reach our staircase. The street is quite scruffy now and disfigured with graffiti, but would have been beautiful in its 18th century heyday.

We had a cappucino and walked the short distance down to Saint Agatha’s cathedral in the plaza. It is attractive without being impressive, as cathedrals go. There were flashy memorials to various dead bishops, who I’m sure were all very humble, modest men.

Humble Bishops in the Duomo

Just round the corner from the duomo is the fish market, which is quite an assault on the senses. There are dozens of stalls selling every type of Mediterranian fish, from tiny clams the size of a finger nail, to huge tuna and swordfish as thick as tree trunks. I have never seen such big fish being hacked to pieces by fishmongers with huge clevers. I wouldn’t get into a fight with one of those guys. There were plenty of stalls selling fresh oysters, and rows of restaurants selling seafood dinners. There appeared to be many more tourists (like me) taking photos than customers buying slabs of dark red tuna or swordfish for 10 Euros a kilo. The octopuses, squid and cuttlefish looked like deflated grey ballons on their marble slabs, when in life they are fantastic dynamic creatures of intelligence that can change their colour to blend in with their environment to hide from predators.

Mmm Swordfish

It was a short walk to Via Etnea, the main shopping street that runs from the cathedral towards Etna. After exhausting fish watching, we revived ourselves in a big cafe and drank Americano’s and watched people, always a good sport.

The fish market is compact and mostly fish, but close to the Piazza Stezicoro (where we met Ernesto yesterday) is the city’s main street market. It is the real living heart of the city, selling fruit, vegetables, meat, clothes, hardware and souvenirs. It is alive with the cries of competing stall holders trying to sell huge aubergines and radishes (I think) that are a metre long. As we shuffled our way through, we occasionally had to stand aside while a scooter came through loaded with ice for a stall. The fruit and vegetables were cheap and looked great, I think Rick Stein would be getting very excited if he was here.

Extremely long vegetables

At the end of the market was a street cafe called La Salumania, where we stopped for a panini and beer. It was possibly the best panini I have ever eaten, with crusty bread and a filling of bacon, salami and salad.

The world’s best paninis are served here

After lunch we ambled back to the flat for a little R&R. But what to do next? We had seen most of what was recommended in the Rough Guide and on Tripadvisor. A place we had seen was La Ciminiere, which was an old sulphur refining factory converted into a conference and cultural centre. It was about 15 minutes away on the coast near the bus station. It appeared to have had lots of money spent on it 30 years ago and is now rusting and looks dreadful, don’t go there. There just isn’t enough money in Catania to keep the city looking smart.

In the evening we went to Ciaru i Mari in Via San D’Orsolo, a seafood restaurant about 5 minutes walk from the flat. It was our second visit because it is such a good place. The staff speak excellent English and are very charming and helpful. I had swordfish (spada) and Julie had tuna (tonno), the best meal we have eaten in Sicily. Their chips were just awesome, and I am a very good judge of chips. The house wine was a Sicilian chardonnay for 15 Euros a bottle, bloody lovely. So I am now a very happy, and slightly drunk, boy.

Top Notch Fish and Chips

And finally, I saw this specialist butcher near the port. Anyone hungry?

Direct fron Blackpool…

Sicily 2024 – Mount Etna

Thursday 23 May

Expedition day today, the great ascent of the south face of Mount Etna. Most of the ascent was by mini-bus, and we didn’t get to the top, but it was further up than anyone else I know. Also we didn’t have Sherpas to carry our bags and I had to film everything myself on my phone.

We met our guide Ernesto by the Roman Amphitheatre that we sussed out yesterday. Five others joined us, a family from Toronto and a charming lady from Cape Town. It took a very pleasant hour of driving upward through pretty towns with narrow winding streets. Like all Sicilians, Ernesto drove like Mad Max trying to escape wild men in armoured quad bikes, very fast and with great confidence.

On the road to Etna

After an hour of zig zagging we reached base camp, Refugio Giovanni Sapienza. Ernesto takes his work as a mountain guide very seriously, and provided us with walking sticks (hiking variety, not broken leg variety) and gaiters. I have never worn gaiters before, but they are tight cuffs you wear round your calves to stop grit getting in your boots.

Then we walked up narrow tracks following Ernesto. The path was steep, narrow, and not solid underfoot. The surface was black volcanic cinders, surounded by cushions of attractive but spikey vegetation, definitly not for sitting on.

Ernesto leading the way

We plodded up and up and up until we got to the top of a ridge. We were treated to a fantastic view of the smoking summit of Etna, streaked with sulphure and a few patches of snow. Beneath us was the Val de Bove, an enormous expanse of black volcanic cinders hundred of metres long and wide covering a huge area of the slope of the volcano.

Val de Bove, its very black

At the top I found we had walked about a mile from the minibus. But it was all up hill, without Sherpas or complicated ladders n’shit.

The descent was less arduous, and we looked over Catania far below all the time. The last big eruption was in 2001, and the lava flows destroyed the road where our van is parked. At one stage we trudged through thick soft black sand, like a Gothic Evil sand dune.

This year I will mostly be wearing Gaiters!

At the end I treated us both to a Magnum icecream, sadly they didn’t have the ones with nuts on the outside.

It was a slightly challenging hike because it was narrow and steep on the way up, but worth it for the fantastic views. It cost 62 Euros each, and I think it was worth it.

Back in Catania we went to the Villa Bellini gardens which are very pretty with a great view of the volcano. Just up the road (Etna) we visited the Ortico Botanico, which looked unloved in the same way that the castle in Ortigia is. I think Sicily just doesn’t have much money for public spaces, it’s one of the poorest parts of Italy.

Spikey stuff in the Ortico Botanico

And finally, some photos to prove that two and a half thousand years of civilisation doesn’t always work in Sicily.

Sicily 2024 – Catania

Wednesday 22 May

Ortigia was very lovely and I would highly recommend it for a short break. All the attractions can be reached by foot. In fact we walked about 10 miles yesterday, but wine aided our recovery and Nero D’Avolo in particular. This morning the air was very clear and we got our first view of Etna from the balcony, which was quite exciting for someone from Lincolnshire where the highest point is about 460 feet.

Etna from our flat in Ortigia

But Tempus does indeed Fugit, and we caught the train to Catania this morning. The 10.25 to Rome trundled along the coast taking about an hour to reach Sicily’s second biggest city. The route took us past oil refineries, a huge port (at Augusta) and Catania airport. I don’t think Michael Portillo will be making a film about it.

We tugged our suitcases for about 10 minutes to reach the next Airbnb, which was on the second floor of a fairly grand 19th century building. it’s quite possibly the best one we have stayed in, and we have stayed in over 50 since 2015. The furnishing is top notch, and the owner left us a selection of cakes in cellophane packets, luxury!

Catania is at the foot of Etna, and has suffered from eruptions and earthquakes over thousands of years. The city centre has been rebuilt in Baroque style, like Noto, but in black volcanic stone rather than yellow limestone. It gives the city a more dowdy feel, and looks like London 50 years ago when it was all black from the coal smoke.

It was lunch time by the time we left the flat, so we stopped at the nearest street cafe that our host had recommended. If they gave awards for the weight of food in a set lunch, this cafe would have won it. The first course was a huge slab of lasagna-ish. It was green and cheesy and enough to feed Tyson Fury on the night before he lost his fight. After battling through that, we got 2 huge meat balls with salad. They could have been beef, or donkey, horse or even camel for all I know. I ate both of mine, Julie could only manage one. Dessert was a tiny sort-of creme caramel in a short glass. After all of that I felt like Mr Creosote ready to explode!

Mystery meat balls and a massive slab of lasagna-ish

The Piazza del Duoma is a short walk from the flat, and in the centre is a stone statue of an elephant with an Egyptian obelisk on its back. It’s the symbol for Catania, and no dafter than the Liver Bird stuck on top a building in Liverpool.

Obolisk on an elephant

The Duomo is all very Baroque and the architect Sig. Vaccarrini clearly thought you couldn’t have too many statues or columns.

Go on, stick on another statue

The fish market was shut, so I missed out on all the dead scaley fauna, but we did have a walk to follow to see the highlights of Catania.

I could describe it all to you, but it’s easiest to sum it all up in two words: Baroque Churches. There are many of them, and once you have seen a few, they all start to look the same. Many of them have freakily realistic statues of dead Jesus, his mother and saints all painted in realist colours . There are banks of electric candles which will switch on if you put a Euro in the slot, and will automatically bump you up in the queue for heaven.

A Baroque-tastic selection of churches

The biggest church is San Nicolo L’Arena, which is cathedral sized. Unfortunately the front facade was never completed, so it looks really weird on the outside. But churches commonly take hundreds of years to finish off, so maybe some billionaire pasta manufacturer will pay for it to be completed.

San Nicolo l’Arena

In the middle of the central shopping area is a pizza-slice of a Roman amphitheatre. Most of it is covered by the city, and only a fraction is on show. A sign said it would have held 15,000 people originally.

a slice of Roman amphitheatre

Just as we were getting a bit churched-out, we saw a fast food outlet and were able to have a McPiss, which was an immense relief. Our run of luck continued with the discovery of – Praise the Lord – a Lidl! So we were able to buy some food for dinner tonight and to take with us on our Etna trip tomorrow.

Sicily 2024 – Noto

Monday 20 May

Sicily has a long history, and for most of that time the primary means of transport was foot or horse. Consequently the Sicilian towns are not great places to drive around, we didn’t hire a car for our trip. So we are missing out on all the fun of being stuck behind tractors, driving round hair-pin bends up mountains and trying to find a parking place in a hill-top village.

The buses are regular and reasonably priced, but they are a bit slow. I have a thick Stephen King novel to read, so I can spare the time rattling along congested highways.

Today we went to Noto, which is about an hour to the south of Siracusa on a hill. Its origins go back to the Greeks, and has subsequently been occupied by all the many invaders after that. For a while it was part of the Kingdom of the Two Sicilies, a short lived 19th century kingdom. At the time, bizarrely, the Kingdom of Naples was also called the Kingdom of Sicily. When it amalgamated with yer actual Sicily it became the Kingdom of Two Sicilies.

There is a local Twickenham connection to this area. The daughter of King Ferdinand of the Two Sicilies, Princess Amilie, married Phillipe the Duc D’Orleans and lived in Twickenham in Orleans House. He later became King of the French and she became the Queen.

Anyway I digress considerably. Noto was destroyed by an earthquake in 1693 and was rebuilt in the Baroque style, and is mostly intact. This is in contrast to other Sicilian cities which were badly damaged by bombing in WWII. It is a UNESCO Heritage site, so you can’t add Velux windows or bi-fold doors to your Baroque palazzo.

We arrived at the impressive entrance gate at the same time as about five million school kids moving like wilderbeest on the Serengeti. I’m sure Italians get lessons in how to talk over each other extremely loudly. Having a conversation appears to be a competitive event, and a sprint rather than a long distance race. The mass of kids were slowly ingested through the gate like a crocodile swallowing a herd of colourful squirrels.

Big gate with thousands of students

Once they had been swallowed we took a side street up from the main drag. The road was steep and lined with honey coloured houses with fancy balconies. I was convinced that there would be a spectacular view of the stunning countryside at the top. But there was just a big white concrete wall. What a bloody waste of energy.

They love a balcony in Noto

S0 we walked back down to the town centre on a footpath about two feet wide. When someone walked in the opposite direction with a dog it was a stare-off until I decided the dachshund looked vicious and stepped onto the road.

We stopped at a cafe and ordered a sandwich for me and a salad for Julie. Oh, and I had a Heineken, it’s my birthday still innit? I noticed that in the cafe opposite they had cones of fried seafood which smelled delicious, and I immediately got food envy. C’est la vie.

There was a kind of flower festival in the town, with displays made up of petals and coloured rice making pictures. That’s why there were so many school kids visiting. It is a well-known fact that kids adore floral displays.

Floral display- kids love ’em

I would imagine that the local pigeons and rats would make short work of the colourful displays, so maybe they mix the petals and rice with a hideous poison or guard them with marksmen on the rooftops.

I heard a car revving extremely hard and noisily in the street. There were lots of Carabiniere standing around in their tight trousers and side-arms, so I expected them to arrest the miscreants. Then I saw that it was a police Lamborghini that was making the racket, fucking show-off.

Flash bastard coppers

There were also some Carabiniere on horses letting people take selfies with them. I guess that would terrify any local Mafiosa thinking of selling cocaine amongst the floral displays.

Horse police for chasing down litter-bugs with sabres

The cathedral is very beautiful, and looks like it was built yesterday. Thats because quite a bit of it was built recently. The dome collapsed in 1996 due to unremidied structural weaknesses after an earthquake in 1990. Having seen how they build their houses in Siracusa, I’m not surprised.

Noto cathedral

Anyway it is very lovely now, and worth a visit. Inside it is relatively plain compared to other Catholic cathedrals, but the ceiling paintings are very good. I’m always at a loss to describe paintings, my vocabulary for that stuff is very limited, and i guess that’s why I never became an art critic.

Magnolia interior, it was on offer in Wickes

Noto has many many places to buy gelato, and today I had a piccolo-sized cone with chocolate and pistachio scoops. In fact I still have some tasty remnants in my beard I can enjoy for the rest of the evening.

The return bus to Siracusa was quicker than the outgoing and I slept for a while. The seats are designed for small people, and I am not. So I dozed bolt-upright with my head lolling about like a puppet with a broken head string.

We bought beers and went to our roof terrace to enjoy the rest of the afternoon and watch the swifts zipping about over the rooftops.

Julie is busy choosing a restaurant for dinner tonight, we didn’t eat out last night because we were full of salty snacks. I am, of course writing this wonderful blog for your entertainment.

Sicily 2024 – Siracusa

Sunday 19 May

Julie woke me at 3am with a cup of tea. I now know how John Hamphries felt every day for about 30 years getting up for the Today programme.Bloody awful. 

However it was MY BIRTHDAY so it was a very special day for little old me.

We drove up  to Luton airport and arrived at 4.30. I say we, but actually Julie drove and I commented on all the middle lane hoggers on the M25, the annoying twats.

We had all the usual EasyJet experience which is too dull to relate, and arrived in Catania, the second city of Sicily. 

Usually the first day of a holiday is sub-optimal. Where’s the bus stop at the airport? Which bus do we get to reach Siracusa? Don’t let those bastards get our seats! Then stuck on a crappy bus for over an hour looking at industrial suburbs before arriving in Siracusa.

But then you arrive and the actual holiday begins, woo hoo! 

You gotta take the rough with the smooth, so there was a big thunderstorm on our way to the flat, and we had to invest in umbrellas that we will probably not use again.

The flat is on the 4th floor of an old building in Ortigia, which is Siracusa old town. It’s where Archimedes lived and was killed by a Roman soldier. Mathematical joke – what is Archimedes favourite food: Apple 3.141

Geddit!!!??

Ortigia is about 1000m long and 500m wide, a small peninsula that was the heart of ancient Syracuse. Sicily belonged to the Greeks and Carthaginians before it became Roman territory. The Duomo (cathedral) was a Greek and Roman temple, and incorporates Doric columns in its walls.

The Duomo with very impressive Baroque facade

I appreciated all the ancient beauty for several glorious minutes before being magnetically drawn into a gelateria. Since it was my birthday I had a big ice-cream, three big scoops plopped on top of each other. The gelato was geologically unstable, and the different strata soon slid around, and it nearly cascaded into my lap. But I skillfully re-established equilibrium with the tiny plastic spoon and my slobbery lips, before I had a gelato avalanche.

Triple layer gelato -it was messy

Ortigia reminds me of Valetta in scale and the baroque architecture that dominates the city after the 1693 earthquake. Where the rendering has fallen off some buildings you can see that they are built of rubble, bricks and mortar in a very haphazard fashion which would give a modern building inspector apoplexy. But they have stood for over 300 years, so I guess that construction method works.

On the sea front is the Fountain of Arethusa, a freshwater spring which has payrus growing in it. Arethusa is the patron nymph of Siracusa, and according to legend this is where she emerged from the underworld. I was looking out for her but she didn’t show up. Nymphs are very unreliable.

Arethusa’s Fountain, but she didnt show up

On the promenade we saw a cafe serving Aperol Spritz to happy looking people. So we joined them and also partook of the happiness. I sucked on my orange straw and consumed several small baskets of salty deep fried ultra processed food. Tim Spector would be horrified, but fuck it, its my birthday.  By the way, the local Messina beer is very average, I prefer Lidl Perlenbacher. I do have sophisticated tastes.

Aproral Spritz, and abundance of UPF and dissappointing beer

Ortigia is very small and walkable. It is touristy, but it is not overwhelmed at the moment. Go there dear reader and you too will become as happy as I am.

As I type I’m on the terrace of our flat 5 stories up looking at terracotta roofs with swifts flying around in great haste. Being sixty eight does have some compensations.

Genius at work